I don't know where to begin.
Tonight, a wave of memories hit me. The good and bad memories, both killing me.
1 month before the anniversary, you left me again like what we have been through together meant nothing at all. It's like a waste of time and energy.
But that's to you. Not me.
My last post stated that I've betrayed myself to be a good woman for you. But that's the point, you made me become a good woman for myself. But honestly, I have never been so much in love when I'm with you despite all the arguments. It's like you gave me a new life, new me new adventures.  How do you move on knowing that you're still in love?
We both once pernah berangan, how our life will be so perfect after marriage bcs we got each other back every day. What I did not expect is that you never want to fight for this relationship and you don't even find a reason to stay. The promises you made to me, to my family, my friends...
Why did you came, gave me so much love and leave me? The only thing I wanna do in front you is just burst my tears out bcs I don't deserve this shit you gave me after everything I gave to you.
Maybe it's true. All of this was never real. I just gotta live with the fact. I could have begged, but the amount of disrespect I've got made me feel unwanted.
I used to be stupid once when you left me for the first time. I almost took my life away. But I'm not gonna do that ever again. I know I'm gonna be okay :) I know I'm gonna be in love again with someone that will never hurt me with goodbye. I also know that this pain will go away eventually, it's just I need to fight for myself a little bit longer.
I changed my blog name so no one will know how I feel now. But if you manage to find this and read this.. I love you.. so much.. Please don't come back. I wish nothing but the best of you, please do the same for me. I will be okay and one day I will move on, just not now.