Hi, I'm back again. So busy with assignments, classes and life haha.
Here is what I'm gonna talk about. Akhmal Roslan :)
Yeah I know, I've said million of times that I will put the end to our relationship. But what can I do? Love is my weakness, and he's my weakness. He's my first love, ever. Its been almost 4 years, and everything's change. As much as I hoped that we could be together for a long time, he doesn't see me in his future.
Remember our first met? 26 October 2013. I seriously did not expect that you're gonna be a part of my life. You were so sweet and charming, and I fell in love. You willing to wait for me to say yes. Take times but you still waiting. You willing to fight for me. Kita buat semua benda sama sama, susah senang kita semua kita face sama sama. Thick and thin, we will always face it together. And now? What happened to us? We changed, you changed. Everyone keep asking me,
"What do you even see in him?"
"Dah sampai tahap mcm ni pun nak stay lagi?"
"Sampai bila nak baca novel yg sama ulang ulang?"
You know why I put it aside all those bullshit? Because I love him, and I put a trust on him that he will change for me one day. No matter what people said, I still want to be with you. But that 'bullshits' make me realise and ask myself, "The 'takpe', ended up makan diri sendiri"
I'm happy when I'm with him, I'm really happy. But he always let me suffer alone by his own act.
No more mengalah with me, no more time for me, no more fight for me to stay, and the saddest part is ..
He doesn't even affected when I left, left with a broken heart. I was no longer his fav girl.
And when I needed him the most, he refused to be there for me. He never care anymore. Dia dah mula bosan, he's feeling started to fading.
Silly me, believing that I'm the one that he only got, that he can never move on with me, no one will replace me. He prove me that its all was a lie. Boys will be boys.
I gave everything, and I've lost it.
I'm exhausted with this easy come easy go. All I want is to be loved.
This might be nothing to you Akhmal, but I'm tired. And I pray to god that I will never turning back after what you've said to me the last we texted. I'm not coming back Akhmal. Its hurt, but its for the best. I hope you realise what you've lost. I fall deeply madly in love with you, but we can never be together. You're the sweetest guy yet you're the guy that I love the most. But Akhmal, you takkan serik and you never appreciate me and the chances that I gave. Remember all the plan we have planned? You ruined it. I've try to settle this in a better way but you refused to cooperate with me.
Loving you, is a lesson for me to learn.